Harris recited the daily Top Ten list. The June 4 topic was "Top Ten Signs You've Hired a Bad Tony Awards Host." According to the "Late Show" website, the top ten reasons follow:
10: Spends first twenty minutes tangled in the curtain
9: Only got the gig because Nathan Lane has swine flu
8: Looks like Shrek, but isn't Shrek
7: Lights go up, pants come down
6: Instead of airfare and a modest fee, he demands a fake passport, enriched uranium and a plane ticket to North Korea
5: Thinks the two gangs in West Side Story are the Jets and the 49ers
4: His only qualification is that he's a distant cousin of Tony Danza
3: Quits after ten minutes, citing "mercury poisoning from sushi"
2: Plans to have a bare-assed Angela Lansbury lowered onto Eminem
1: He's straight
CBS will air the 63rd Annual Tony Awards June 7 beginning at 8 PM ET.
For more information visit www.tonyawards.com.