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I won! First of all, let me say that for weeks I had "The Teddy Awards" written on my iPhone calendar. I could not remember what the H it was. Was I hosting? Nominated? I did a search of all of my emails and couldn't find any mention of it. I Googled it and saw that is was a gay/lesbian award…in Berlin. Was I nominated for my piano playing on the German tour of A Chorus Line in the early '90s? Why did I write down "The Teddy Awards"?
Finally, I realized that I was referring to [AUDIO-LEFT]the Independent Reviewers of New England Award, for which I was nominated. I had thought it was so hilarious that the acronym was the "IRNE" and therefore basically unpronounceable. I finally found out it's pronounced "Ernie" but I had put it on my calendar as the Teddy Awards because it reminded me of the awards ceremony that Mary Tyler Moore was always going to on her show. Remember? One year, she doesn't hear the name of the winner and Rhoda tells her she won but she didn't? And she goes up to the stage? Hilarious and devastating. Anyhoo, I wanted to travel to Boston for the ceremony but I had a read-through of my new Disaster musical on Monday and couldn't make it up there in time. I sent a speech to read in case I won and, turns out, I did! Deconstructing Broadway won "Best Visiting Show" for when I did it at SpeakEasy Stage Company. I wish I had seen my speech read, but this is what I made the representative from SpeakEasy read:
"Hi, everyone. It's Seth writing on my laptop because, unfortunately, I had to be in New York tonight. Let me first say 'Yay! I'm so excited I won. If that 'yay' seemed a little low energy it's because the person reading it didn't convey the energy I wanted to express. Perhaps he or she is tired after a long day. Let me also say thank you so much for voting for my show. If that 'thank you' seemed a little disingenuous, yet again it's because the person reading it wasn't able to convey my gratitude and perhaps he or she has difficulty in his or her own life saying 'thank you.' Finally, let me give a big thank you Speakeasy for bringing me up to Boston and if any of you missed my show, I'm happy to say I'll be doing it all summer long at the Art House in Provincetown. Hopefully, the reader of this speech conveyed my internal desperation for an audience and my annoying penchant for self-promotion. Peace out!"
Now, on to the next piece of business: Attention theatre audiences — stop applauding at the end of scenes! I can't take it. I went to see The Normal Heart, which was phenomenal in so many different aspects — which I will relate — but first, let me address my initial comment. There were so many incredible scenes that ended with me riveted and wanting to bask in the various emotions that were stirred, but instead, because there was a blackout, some idiot in the audience felt "When there's a blackout, we must applaud." No, we mustn't! It was so infuriating. There was electricity in the audience that no one wanted to break, but then the idiot, or idiots would start their crazy clapping and the rest of the audience felt the peer pressure and joined in. Stop! Have some sense of theatricality! That's right, I've had it.
photo by Joan Marcus |
photo by Peter James Zielinski |
It's now May, which means that "Seth Speaks," my new radio talk show, is about to debut on Sirius/XM! Tune in this Sunday from 5-6 PM (ET) on the Stars Channel (107) for my premiere episode. If you don't have Sirius/XM, you can get 30 days for free by going here.
PS, I got sassed by a Tony and Emmy Award winner on Twitter. I posted: "35 min on stair climber! I want to look 1970's skinny for my Disaster Movie Musical. 23 days to go." I got mostly laudatory comments and then Andrea Martin posted: "Someone might want to commit to more than 35 minutes, if you get my drift. But good for you." Sass! Speaking of Disaster!!!, I had lots of the actors over at my apartment to read the script for the first time. One of my co-writers is Jack Plotnick and he was "at" the read-thru on Skype. It was so modern-age. The only mind-boggling part was when we all saw the computer moving around on his end and we finally realized he was taking us with him…to go pee. Wow. Tip o' the hat to Urinetown? I'm just glad he didn't double book the read-thru and a colonoscopy. Regardless, the script got so many laughs. Now we just have to finish it. Ouch. Nonetheless, I'm very excited about the show! You can get tickets by calling (646) 336-1500. And now…peace out!
(Seth Rudetsky has played piano in the pits of many Broadway shows including Ragtime, Grease and The Phantom of the Opera. He was the artistic producer/conductor for the first five Actors Fund concerts including Dreamgirls and Hair, which were both recorded. As a performer, he appeared on Broadway in The Ritz and on TV in "All My Children," "Law and Order C.I." and on MTV's "Made" and "Legally Blonde: The Search for the Next Elle Woods." He has written the books "The Q Guide to Broadway" and "Broadway Nights," which was recorded as an audio book on Audible.com. He is currently the afternoon Broadway host on Sirius/XM radio and tours the country doing his comedy show, "Deconstructing Broadway." He can be contacted at his website SethRudetsky.com, where he has posted many video deconstructions.)