By Seth Rudetsky
08 May 2007

Wednesday was my monthly show at Cardinal Cooke Hospital. I've been volunteering for Lifebeat's Hearts and Voices for 15 years. We bring singers to people hospitalized with AIDS. It's so much fun. I'll never forget when I was working in the prison AIDS ward and one of the inmates/patients was obsessed with my friend's (the triple-threated Naomi Naughton) rendition of "Nothing." He'd ask for it all the time. I finally got Priscilla Lopez to come in and sing it for him, and after the show I was talking to her about "Mr. Karp." She assured me that the whole song was real (except his name), and I asked how he died. Turns out, he killed himself! Wow. Was it left out of the song because it was too much of a downer? "Six months later I heard that Karp . . . had killed himself." Hmmm, I guess it also would have been too many eighth notes.

Thursday I had a dream come true. I did my Broadway Chatterbox talk show sandwiched between Austin [Miller] and Derek [Keeling]! Yes, the two would-be Danny Zuko's told all. Well, all they could legally tell without NBC following through on their threat to sue them for a million dollars if they breached their confidentiality agreement. The good news is, Derek said he's about to do a reading of a new musical, and Austin just filmed a pilot. Also, Austin hinted that he might join the Broadway Hairspray company! They said that during the TV show, they were housed in what they joked was "the crappiest mansion they ever lived in." Although Elton John's house was next door, their pool was broken, the dishwasher was broken and the gate to enter was broken. The most amazing part of the house was the view of L.A., but one day it was all smog outside and Derek said, "Even the view broke!"

Derek also talked about the two-year bus-and-truck tour he did of Grease before he was on the TV show. Because he was Danny, he got two seats on the bus. I guess that's a fun way to sleep for two years. "Wait a minute," I suddenly said. "Tour? I thought Austin was the only professional actor." Derek quickly remembered that he was indeed a "decorator," as per the profession chyroned underneath him during the show. The show culminated with them singing a duet version of "Sandy," including the amazing inner dialogue "Sandy, my darling. You hurt me real bad…"

Over the weekend I saw The Pirate Queen, and brava to Stephanie J. Block for perilous ship climbing across scaffolds and perilous high belting across Ds and Es.

Sunday was my mom's birthday, and I threw her a surprise brunch with some of my friends. Stephen Spadarro (one of the Weissler company managers) got her a shirt that says "Chai Maintenance." L'Chaim! After the brunch, my mom wouldn't stop hocking me (Jewish expression for nagging) that we were going to be late to see Talk Radio, and she "hates being late for anything." I assured her that she was crazy, and I've lived in Manhattan since I was 23 years old. We got into a cab on 74th Street at 2:40 PM, and by 3 PM were at 65th Street. So in a sense, we weren't late seeing Talk Radio. We simply missed the whole show. The good news is, she has a new story to add to her repertoire that includes her warning me to change trains at Jamaica when I take the Long Island Rail Road and me forgetting to do it one time, which landed me in the wrong station (that one's good for multiple "tsk-tsk-tsks" and head shaking from an elderly Jewish women). Happy Birthday.

All right, I'm off to prepare for three Jennifer Hudson concerts this week. Let the belting begin!

*

(Seth Rudetsky is the host of "Seth's Big Fat Broadway" on SIRIUS Satellite Radio and the author of "The Q Guide to Broadway." He has played piano in the orchestras of 15 Broadway musicals and his show, Seth's Broadway 101, will be presented April 16. He can be contacted by visiting www.sethsbroadwaychatterbox.com.)

(l.-r.) Austin Miller, Seth Rudetsky and Derek Keeling at Seth's Broadway Chatterbox.

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