By Ben Rimalower
24 Aug 2013
Flash back to my first awareness of Patti in the EVITA commercial, when I was four.
That commercial is everything. Okay... First, there's a chorus screaming the name of the show, "Evita, Evita, Evita!" This show is important. This woman is important; it's young Patti, beautiful, blonde, bejeweled, beseeching Argentina not to cry for her. Why would a country cry for her? And what's with the army guy biting the cap off his beer? I smell danger...
Then, you get brassy, brunette belting Patti dancing and dressing like Debbie Allen in West Side Story, telling Buenos Aires to stand back with a vibrato that leaves them no choice. She is threatening, warning us we oughta know what we're gonna get in her. She says it's just a little touch, just a little touch, but I can tell she means a lot.
Back to blonde Patti, only now she's singing "just a little touch" too. Blonde Patti singing Brunette's Patti's song is like the end of the Thriller video when nice Michael Jackson's eyes glow red. Nice Patti's a zombie too! It's scary. And it's exciting! She smiles and the way her eyes light up, you know whatever shit goes down, it's gonna be a good time.